Author Archives

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This proves I am only human

i really needed to push in yesterday, to find the sanctuary f God.

Why, my son hadn’t fully unpacked but what I heard was, bring over the 30 boxes and you can unpack. Not what he meant, to only unpack the kitchen things.

So he spoke to me not very nice and cracked it, to put it plainly.

The old me wanted to run away, because I was hurt and yes even cried. But the newme thought hang on, don’t let the devil in him get away with it.

So I walked down the very long dirt drive retrieved the bin, he came to me we discussed it. I gently told him that his tone can really hurt, that I was sorry for the miss understanding and said that’s it finished.

I didn’t yell or throw a wobbly like the old me would have, I thought that Jesus was gentle so too would I be.

So so this proves how human I am, I believe that this dark thing over him through those dark games is going to be removed.

But I am not going to be the bad guy here, I will let the love of the Lord shine through.

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Update on my boy

Last night he was moved out of Ccu and into the surgical ward, they are amazed with his progress. Yahoo

So my heart to you who prayed thank you so very much, I am sitting here waiting for the call to go get him.

Isnt God good, so many were praying for him and I know beyond a shadow of doubt it’s because of those prayers.

I shouldn’t call him a boy at 183cm tall, he ain’t little. But a mum always will see her kids as Cubs to be protected.

I read what I post sometimes and shed a tear because I wish that those I love would read this and really know my heart. I try so hard to be a good person as my fathers daughter, to be kind and funny. For I need to change the familiar

But I feel that it’s not noted, but sitting here with the lord it helps for I know it’s a lie so I must push and keep going. For I won’t stop being me, yes lord thank you

just been reminded I was born extrodinary, someday those will see. Big breath feel better now.

god bless

just got the call going to get him

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Need or want?

Yes I am back to that again.

I need to be on Gods agenda, I need to understand my purpose.

I want to own my little home and work in a job that I love, with people who show honour and respect.

Now I know these days that may be a hard ask but my father knows, he already has it for me. I don’t need to stress, all I need to do is trust.

So I get up get moving and make today count, for we don’t know what can happen tomorrow. Nothing can happen to you, that shouldn’t be.

What do I mean by that, if you are doing something wrong or ungrateful then it will catch up with you. And when you whine and say, why is this happening. Do a recall of memory, I urge you to be kind, thoughtful and have empathy for someone today.

Dont do something expecting a return in the natural, just do it with integrity and honour.

If your parents are alive then honour them, yes you may not see eye to eye. But what I always go back to is my relationship with mine, I can only remember my mother saying once she loved me just before she died, she didn’t hug or show affection.

But I didn’t let that stop me showing her that I loved her and I even thanked her for what she had done. What we forget in our growing, is not to hold onto un forgiveness, through much hurt she produced a wall. But with love I was able to make a hole, don’t look at the now, use history to understand a person more.

It just might pay dividends.

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We had a visitor last night

It was really late (2am) and I couldn’t sleep, so I lay there for a while. I heard a car with no lights drive up wait a few turn and leave.

Now most would freak (especially sleeping in a caravan) , I checked to make sure there was no one around and making sure the cars were there.

I just took it as the devil was trying to scare me, but my trust in the father I knew I would be fine.

No I haven’t lost my mind, only because of the miracles and things he has done for me, do I trust him. Accepting what is real, we are taught that if we don’t have tangable evidence then it doesn’t exist.

But his word says to pray, for you know not what you are praying. In the heavens it must be done by spirit before it happens on earth.

So I go by that, for his word does not lie. My thinking is that of a knowing that what I keep doing is building in the spirit. He will not fail me or forsake me, it’s been done in the heavens and as he said to me as a child.

I will always look after you.

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Finally, let him

Let him heal you, renew you.

Do not think of yourselfs better than the other. Do what he asks of you, for the glory is there for the taking.

Narrow is the road that leads to life, if you fail a test. Then do something about it, we sometimes go off And sulk, as my mother would say, get over yourself and grow a pair (balls that is).

I want him to heal my land, I am willing to cultivate, to rid myself of the weeds. To prepare the soil, so the seeds can grow and God can send the rain, for the harvest is mine for the taking and I WILL TAKE WHAT IS MINE.

god bless

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We don’t know how close the last days are…

The generation today will hold the keys for those who are to come in. Come into what, the protection of the spirit for if anyone means you harm, God will take your spirit and you will not feel a thing.

Sounds good old to me and I don’t want to chance anything else. Proverbs 6 v6-11 sometimes we are not in tune with God because we had turned his volume down.

When we do the will of the father we will see not only us chane but the church, for we are the church because Christ lives within us as his vessels. God is coming to shape the nations, people are being called home, strategicly placed for when Jesus comes back.

The key ingredient is to serve, faith comes by hearing faith that comes from God. And you may not see the rain but in the spirit you can feel it. God old wants to send you the rain, how badly do you want it?

Look at 1 kings v41-44 he was told to go back up the mountain 6 times he came back and said, there is nothing. But he was dutiful that when he was told to go up again he said, there is a cloud as small as a fist.

I have to be honest, I probably would have said, no way went there once and saw nothing. The. I would have given cheek and said if you want to know them you go. Big mistake, be a good steward and go even if it takes 7 times or more. Never give up becUse the father never will.

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Prayer will bring your prophecy to pass

Do you know that?

Did you know that God will withhold the rain. And I know just like me, you need the rain.

So pray, like a woman giving birth don’t give up till you get it. Do whatever you need too. God will honour that, when you make yourself available. Shout out declare, bind the strong man who has been pulling your strings causing you distress.

If you don’t know how to pray start with the Lord’s Prayer, I start out say,” lord I thank you for all you have done, all you are doing and all your about to do. Then I tell him what I need from him, sometimes I even demand it. For I am not one to let it go, then because I have been filled by the spirit I pray in tongues. Some think it sounds weird or is scary, what I know is you are talking the Gods language and guess what, the devil can’t understand. Did you know the devil sits there waiting to hear you talk so he can go out and cause trouble. Yep, so doesn’t matter what is coming out of your mouth when you pray in tongues, for he can to do a thing yeehaa.

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Verses can help you

Verses I believe can help you with whatever you need. The night before my sons operation. I read Isaiah 44 v8 do not fear, nor be afraid. Have I not told you from that time and declared it? You are my witness. Is there a God besides me? Indeed there is no other rock. I know not one.

Its like not understanding that the agenda is doing Gods business, for when a queen is chosen if she doesn’t understand her purpose, she will ultimately loose her crown. She didn’t get when the KING commands you must obey, not if you feel like it

Its the same with us, I know I am the apple of his eye, he has loved me always but before I couldn’t except it. Here are some questions to ask yourself, how connected are you to God? How is your supply? How is your identity on the vine? Or are you doing just what you want to do, this may hurt but I wish someone had said it to me.

If you know God but will do what you want when you want and only call him when you have tried everything else. Then I ask you this, what the hell are you thinking? I have seen miracles, I have heard his beautiful voice. Get it now before you have to go through anymore pain, give up repent and bow before the king. He wants to change the condition of your heart, be smart and let him.

in simple terms don’t be sanctimonious, when you think no one is watching. He watches you everywhere, he hears your thoughts and knows your heart and I will keep telling you until you get it  get off your backside and pray, don’t let the devil fool you with other idols in your life  he wants us to be more dependant on him  when you do this God will birth something in your life, humble yourself repent and renounce first, I have given you a key  why not put it in the door and turn it.

Someone said to me last week, you have softened. Your approachable, nice gentle and full of love.

I always was was but the devil kept reminding me of what I have done wrong. When I turned off his leaking tap of judgement and power in my mind, then something changed.

i just got this and I hate it when I think of all the time I have wasted, I love to just find the truth and lock it in and press GO.

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Peace is something we all need

i was brought up in a way because my father expect the house to be spotless and if it wasn’t done he would hit the roof and burn whatever on a pile down the back.

Yes it doesn’t sound great, but what it instilled in me is that I have to always be doing something.

Which can bug people but if I stop I sleep, at home I try and give myself one day, to not do anything. Trust me when I say this is like putting a lollie in front of a child and telling it not to touch.

I was brought up the old way, if you go to someone’s home as a guest you help out, showing your appreciation for letting you stay.

I still have a mind that constantly goes 1000 miles an hour, I know the lord put that into me for a reason and when it’s time. He will tap me on the shoulder and say ok, now it’s time. I really believe that, belief is faith in action.

I have had this feeling over the last week that I am ready, don’t know why but I trust the process.

I will keep you posted, I do hope my words help you or just make you laugh. This is just my journey with the king of kings, I am coming into the knowing of what that means.

Peace is something I use to crave more than air, but now having peace it was worth finding that place it was hard but what I relished is I had to trust.

To trust and really do it with my whole being. I hope if you need peace that the father grants it to you.

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Apologises

i am working again from my sons IPAD loving it but have not got all the control of the normal set up.

My son and I had a discussion about that young boy who was a suicide bomber for Isis. I know he was a loner, but I made the point of what I did when I was at school.

As a teenager my mother said you have the power, so when I got what she meant I took charge. I made point of talking to the quiet ones, the shy ones who were picked on. Really what did I have to loose, i was brutally honest saying I had no interest in going out with them. But I wanted to get to know them and there interests what made them tick. Because I wanted to change the atmosphere and show by example, that we are all the different in some way.

But it as I have said to some who get all racist, do you think God sees you because of colour? No he doesn’t, he sees you. The one who has private thoughts and feelings, the real you.

You may have noticed I love that, well better go feed my sons cat. Be blessed.