Category Archives: Just Me

by

I know I have broken through

Today I quickly regretted going out without checking myself, but hey it takes time and money to get back on deck.

I saw a sibling, that always dress’s well, but looks down the nose at others. I saw, the person stop turn look at what I was doing and give a stern look and turn and left the shop.

All I said was, “cranky woman” I am not condemned by what they may think. I know where I stand, and very soon I will dress how I feel inside.

Once I get my hair done, eyebrows and its a few degrees warmer, I will shine like the sun.

The enemy holds nothing over me, cloths are starting to fall off my butt and I am excited for what is to come.

I will never look down on anyone, for it is not my place, my father loves everyone, but he also gives them a choice, a choice to choose.

I am running my own race here and I love where I am at, I have moved into the light and I am warming up.

I pray all are blessed by my positive words.

by

Everyday I notice the difference

Yesterday I took a break, went to Bunnings and noticed, before the thought of going out was a big mental battle.

Who will see me, what will they think, watch the face movement, pick up on what they are saying by not saying anything. Try and make it seem OK, that you are dressed a little better than a bag lady etc etc etc.

The enemy kept telling me things like, do you really think you should go, are you really worth it, can you spare the money, your this your that, all the time.

Yesterday I went out and thought NOTHING, but wanted it to be a little warmer, I have nice cloths but just not ready to wear.

But watch out, this little duck is coming back into life, I am so excited I cannot even explain what its like to not be condemned for everything I or others have done.

And bags of cloths are in the car, ready to drop off and give to others, yipee. Before I would have just kept everything, not anymore.

by

The new ME

Since condemnation has been removed, its like I have awakened, not knowing that I was even asleep.

Before, you have no idea, my head kept me hiding from day to day activities. A simple trip to the shop, would take a lot of mental effort to plan where I would go and what I would do.

Normally, I would pick something plain, because I would say to myself, pretty stuff is for others, not me.

The other day I saw a doona cover, it was pink and had big flowers on it, now to many this would not seem anything big. But its like, I am learning about the new me, the hidden me that I never knew before.

I feel like a rose, that was in a hard, closed down bud, but now I have bloomed and its the most beautiful feeling.

This could not have happened if it was not for my trust in the father, I said to him many times, I know it will hurt at the time, but it needs to be done. So when you feel its right, please, I give you authority to do, what needs to be done.

And how wonderful is he, to know I had come to the end of what I could tolerate inside and give him full rein.

 

by

Getting even more excited

Since last week, people have noticed, my eyes are open, they see a brightness.

And I feel taller and lighter, the hunger for food that is not the best is gone. Before I would eat a box of ice creams and look for more in one go. I bought a box to see, took 5 days to get rid of it and I really had to push, not buying anymore.

I spoke to my daughter, I told her about my experience and I hoped it would inspire her.

Before I was in a washing machine, that kept washing the dark pile and I could not get onto spin and dry myself off.

I would wear track pants down the street because I didn’t care or used the excuse of my hernia that does not like tight pants, or about my appearance, hair, eye brows etc etc.

Since Monday, I feel so undressed, I want to hide, even at home. I now want to put on the nice things that are in my wardrobe, omg I am so looking forward to the warmer weather. I need money fast too get my hair done, etc etc.

I am excited more and more, oh Lord I am so very humbled and grateful for everything you do.

And you know I am all for whatever you need to do and need of me….

by

Impulse, where did that get ya…

For the last few weeks the Lord has pressed upon me about impulse.

Now, when I was little, you were not given a lot of yes’s, but taught to hold on and appreciate a yes, when it came.

Now, impulse it seems is rife, kids get most of what they want and even adults, flash the credit card and get what they want.

When did living within your means stop, when did, you worked hard for the harvest and then put away for the winter. This comes to money also, you should be able to put some away, so when bills come in you have money to pay them.

We somewhere flipped a switch and go on about our day, like in a haze.

What happened, I believe the enemy came in slowly, think about it. Ads tell us if we don’t have a big house or everything new, or dress our kids in fashion, we somehow are not worth anything.

What the… sorry but let kids be kids, best cloths are for best. Don’t spare the rod to spoil the child. It says it in his word, I don’t want a big house, more to heat and cool, more on the rates, more water and would that really make me happy, hell NO.

So bring back the basics, I love the KISS principle, never hurt me and now I am so very thankful for all the training I have had to endure, because it made a real woman out of me.

I have no desire to spend a fortune on nails or cloths or trying to be someone else, I was born exceptional and I do not have to fit anyone.

Only be his bride and all will fall into place, the way its suppose too.

My daughter as an example, impulse got her inside and locked up. Not so good is it, but the enemy is defeated. No longer will he have any place in my DNA, because my father won the victory for me and her.

While she is in there she has time, to learn to trust the true father, and I say AMEN.

by

Dear Hubby

Dear future husband
I had a feeling so strong to write to you.
I may be a harder nut to crack but don’t give up.
I love yellow flowers and snow white freesia’s.
Please don’t buy me any man made items, you will need to learn about my allergies. And honey, you gonna have to like the shade of green I love.
kindness touches my heart.
When it comes to being close, I am a very private person and I really dislike embarrassment, privacy is key to our start.
Words are great, but actions speak loud and clear to me.
And when I may seem tough, trust that I know what is happening or going too. Protection has been a reflex, many years in the making and seeming to be tough is part of that.
So when I finally meet you, a joke or a laugh can be part of that reflex, but dig a little deeper. God knows we are each others match and trust why he will put us together, in his right time and season….
xxx B
by

We forget to separate…

Many times I hear people comment about a person and muddle the waters.

What do I mean, prime example, many in America don’t like Donald Trump.

Well hello, that is beside the point, I ask you this, is he doing a good job?

I hear he saved billions of dollars, he may ruffle the feathers, but he didn’t pluck any.

And by the way, a country needs to be run as a business most of the time. Not run by an actor who wins votes from a fan club.

Another Kim K, she might have done something good recently, but really she is famous for not doing anything. And she uses her body for fame, am I the only one who sees the sale of her soul for money.

Maybe, maybe not, but really we need to be a little more wise, for wisdom should be of most value.

by

The old way, sometimes is the only way.

More and more the younger generation, think they know it all.

But we have not taught them, what history has come before. And so they go off, thinking they know, but most of the time. It all seems like just a fiction novel and not at all real.

So, go back, bring forth his word, the awful history that he, not only had to go through for us.

But wars and all the bad hidden things, we need to remember and know the suffering. To be humble and move forward with all the knowledge, so we don’t repeat it again.

I use to think at times, I got it more than others, then he corrected me, honour has to be advised. You must go under authority, because even when something may seem fool proof, the enemy can use it.

I think it this way, before it happens, he dangles the lollies before your eyes. To see YOU take the bait, but hold back, for the true father has the whole shop for you and much much more….

by

Trust in me…

How is the trust in me and I in him which can lead you to be a very good steward.

I have always been very trustworthy, as in you leave valuables or money with me and it will be the same when you return. Doesn’t matter how much or how valuable, if it is not mine then I must respect that.

So the words in Luke 16 V 10 – 13 ring true in me.

10 He who is faithful in what is least is faithful also in much; and he who is unjust in what is least is unjust also in much. 11 Therefore if you have not been faithful in the unrighteous mammon, who will commit to your trust the true riches? 12 And if you have not been faithful in what is another man’s, who will give you what is your own? 13 No servant can serve two masters, for either he will hate the one and love the other, or else he will be loyal to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and mammon.

How many times do you think if you got away with something small, ooh goodie. Well I don’t, I go back and tell them, then if they freely give, I can receive.

If you love him, his word and are so very grateful to all he has done, then this will be a breeze.

And do not give the accuser any room to say otherwise.

by

When the going gets tough

I am so very thankful, the enemy has tried to finish me off many times and failed.

What did it do inside deep deep down, it trained me. So when it gets tough, I hunker down and hang on.

I will not step back, I will take each movement closer to him, even if I have to crawl.

Why, because when you know him like I do and know what his word can do.

You get tough, and when the going gets tough, this tough cookie gets going..

It might seem cliche, but its up to you. You can either continue to be a victim of the enemy or flip it and become a survivor.

Who can then use what has been, for those to come across your path. To show by evidential proof that he is real, that by doing what the word says, they can also be survivors, using what has been for good.

To make those in the world know that when they think we may be foolish, we have become wise beyond reasoning.

Be blessed, suns out I am off yahoo.