Category Archives: Just Me

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My miracle with dogged determination

Now I have to be blunt so you understand, in 2013 I was given a procedure that showed I had Diverticulitis.

What were my symptoms, remember the mass it caused me to have problems getting rid of waste, black, rust, light tan, yellow and even a shade of green were seen. I had tests after tests that always showed I had infection, I had fever pain, gas coming from places I could not explain. And a smell that was worse than a septic swamp.

So I listened at the time, diet changed, fibre I had to watch reduce etc etc. The threat of either having an operation etc was said, so what did I do.

I listened, but would not accept, I had to say the words in the world, but I did not take it in.

I said to the Lord, I am not accepting this, I am your daughter and of your DNA. If I am meant to fulfil your plan for my life, then you have to fix this vessel, I demand it in Jesus name.

I will not accept this in anyway (I was determined with no doubt, he word says if you believe then you receive), by the blood of Jesus Christ who took this on him for me, it is removed in Jesus name. I demand it to go, I said this over and over and I would not accept anything else, even when things got really tough.

So I praise the Lord and father God, for hearing my words and making this MIRACLE happen for me. I feel so very humbled and thankful for taking this from me. Tests on Tuesday showed no sign of it and never being there. Yahoo

You can have it too, get so very determined that you cannot fail by his blood that covers me.

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Blessing’s are coming my way

I have a print off, what was said a long time ago, “I decree that something great is about to happen to me.”

And “I am the EXCEPTION, not the rule” these I see every day when I wake up. And its effect is taking place, I felt it so real today.

So I say to you, blessings are coming my way. Say this to yourself, he will give these to you at the best time.

Just rest in the knowledge of this and even though its really cold, 9 degrees at the moment.

OMG bring on spring, even though tomorrow is the first day of winter, I am calling it in. LOL

Thank you father, for loving me even when I don’t feel I deserve it, but you know my heart is yours, I trust you with my plan and I did agree with what you said as I formed in my mothers womb. I now trust that I was meant to be hear at this time on this day.

Thank you for all you have done, everything you have given to me and for knowing you can trust me to be your steward…

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Trust in what has been done

Trust that Jesus died for us, trust the word and believe, hold tight for the outcome to what you are going through.

It frustrates but also annoys me when I sleep the enemy tries to upset my rest. But awakening this morning, I know the truth. My son has made a choice but most young people I know are self righteous and set in their ways. But I am the mother, I get my say to be heard, not shut down, you need to listen and respect it, whether you agree or not.

Yes the dream include him and a warped way of what is going on, but I know the truth and my life does not stop because of this, it increases because of it. It lays a foundation of development not only in me, but also my son, he must learn the lesson. And I must allow the father to teach him, he always warned me, mum if you say God or Jesus I am going home. My response, BYE, don’t pull that form of blackmail on me, it doesn’t work.

So as I sit here sharing, I trust what has been laid in place, my plan and I wait for the outcome to come, in HIS right season and time.

Remember that today, hold tight and turn it around, see what is trying to be done, to bless you. He will not fail you, trust is the key.

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The Lord reminded me…

My worth is great and I am a zillionaire times a zillion.

Because in every way I am a good steward and he has found someone, whom he can trust.

I believe this is priceless gift, and I always love a bargain, any cloths I very rarely pay full price and $20 is my limit.

It may seem like a minimal amount, but I always remember who’s money it really is and I am very humble and thankful for that…

 

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Hiding behind FAT

Yes, when I got married before in the world, there was a history of bad behaviour from men. So my response was, to hide.

Since I was 19 yrs old I have hidden, men do not noticed a fat woman. And that was comfortable to me. Yes I did get back for a short time, to my size 11.

But again, males were not kind, so now I buy cloths that cover and are decent, most I do not like, but they do the job.

When I see me, in the mirror, I do not like what I see. But again, when so many bad things have happened it becomes a comfortable familiar, that you hide behind.

So, last night I found myself wanting to look like what I know I feel under the fat layer.

I want to feel the smile, I know is hiding behind what I carry around and I want to do it for my hubby and for me.

I am stronger now, and if I do not like the way I am treated, I can make sure that I make my point LOUD AND CLEAR….

No one is ever fat because they want too, they are hiding, either illness or emotions, so be extra kind. It may make the difference…

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Wow have I had to find another level

Over the past time I have had to find another level and I also had to curl up and shut down a little.

My child is back to adjusting my depth of sadness for her girls.

Being a mum and most of it I was single because the dad didn’t care. I was brought up and I admit, most of my normal, was not that normal at all.

So I did the best at the time I knew what to do, but being on my own. When she goes off course, it hits hard and I am sharing this because I am human. If I can help anyone, I will share my heart.

I wanted desperately to have a relationship like you see others having, but something she wrote “you need me, like I need you”.

Growing up, I had no one to stand up for me, to support my emotional state, to know they loved me and it would never COST me anything.

But I did not, until the Lord spoke to me, so when I read this, it brought me back. I depend on him, I need him, she has to find that out for herself.  And in the meantime, everything I do, is building the place for the next generations after me.

Last night, for I think the first time, I really stepped forward within my heart, wanting my hubby to come and be that support. As I said last night, I have been ripped off in so many ways by the enemy and I want it restored NOW.

Its time, time to start a life, I was destined to live and it starts now.

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Again I say it..

Ladies and gents, KNOW YOUR WORTH.

Stay in his presence, cross into what he has and never forget you are made for greater things.

If things happen to you, flip it, make it count for good. Make lemons into lemonade and let the sun shine within you even if the enemy is trying to make it a cloudy day.

You are loved, so receive it and treasure your place in his house.

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Me too…

What happens when those who have done, ugly things to you may have passed away and your still holding this hurt.

FORGIVENESS is the key, when you hold on, you only hurt yourself and those close to you.

Someone who thinking about it now makes me feel physically sick may be dead, hopefully. See what I am doing, I need to get this off me. I need to heal, so many mistakes have been made by me, because of what has not only happened to me, but also my mother.

This familiar thing keeps tracking generation after generation and you must face it and get it out.

Clean up, clear out and be beautiful for who you are, not the body your in…

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Rejection is out

Last night we had a ladies night and something buried came to light.

Rejection, so many times I have felt, they don’t like me or I have done something wrong.

Well I have not, rejection out, Jesus in.

This was my prayer last night, when I was younger I had nobody to stand up for me. Today I have the Lord, there by my side all the way. And when a storm is happening he is still there with me, he will never leave me or forsake me.

Remember who is on your side, then you can never loose. But clean out what comes to the light, remove what holds you back, open the doors to the locked room within.

And finally be free to live the life he has for you…