My heart, how its changed…

I was once very damaged, especially with my thoughts.

Hurting a person especially a male, I wouldn’t even bat an eye, not physically but mentally.

I was able to manipulate and screw with their minds. Now I am in no way happy with what I did, I am so sorry now for any pain I caused. At the time, all I did was completely justified (in my own mind), most of the time, I needed to feel pain, I needed to feel something, because I was so numb, I couldn’t feel anything. I never felt droplets of water when it rained, I never felt the wind touch my skin, it was quiet bizarre now I think about it.

Until my journey with the Lord, I remember the day I felt the water on my skin. It was like a dam being broken. Slowly but surely over the years he has healed my heart, I feel with such a sweetness. I have this over whelming urge, I cannot lie, I cannot do anything to harm anyone.

Every little thing I appreciate and a new season fills me with joy, my heart has changed to such a sweetness and for that I have my father to thank.

It has taken time to reverse the damage, but he has done it softly. He took the rubbish in me and recycled it till I couldn’t recognize it anymore.

He has made me knew, this is not rocket science, but very achievable. Yes I have the odd, what the moment, but they are questions I need an answer too. It is never meant to harm, it’s too question, because I want to live my fathers way, not the worlds.

In my father there is peace, love, joy and I want it all.

Smile its a beautiful day 🙂


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