I have been watching that show on 7 and how the feelings I get of panic, anxiety and to be aware comes one me.

I get a cold sweat and the childhood I grew up in, comes to light.

I don’t want you to feel sad for me, but I am glad of the training for the last days are here and those who are not aware will miss it.

Yes it was sad, watching my so called father, belt my mother and be directed by his mother to go home and sort her out. But it was not called domestic violence it was just marriage.

Being a child of it, you had to go into survival mode, know when to stick your head out and when to either run or hide. When to help mum, after the incident and never to talk about it. Either at school or to anyone outside, you knew that it could make it worse.

And because she didn’t bruise there was no evidence. But her inability to use an arm for a while.

But it gave me an ability to watch or how to react in a dangerous situation, most do not know this. I believe this will serve me well, and has given me such a strength that has stayed with me.

In my home, beside my bed I have a jack handle, that I have always had. You break in, you will leave with a headache, if I have the opportunity. I will not back down from a fight for my life and going after the father is my safety.