I have found it hard to let people in, yes having had experiences that did rock me to the core. It is hard, I need a certain amount of time, to see if what is said rings true.

Many times, people get one side of a story, and sometimes it is, just a story.

But with me, if I let you near me, count your blessings, you have established a foundation and its up to you whether you break it or not.

History does dictate the present, because you become extra vigilant, extra wary and that is no one fault. It is just how it is, presently, I am not one to throw the past in anyone’s face unless you play dirty and try to push me in the wrong way.

It is how I have been honed over time, I try every day to move into him, because I know its a better place to be, I know how far of a level I have grown in the understanding of him.

Many who just go to church have not yet reached that far, and that is their journey. If I can assist anyone, to just keep strong and keep pushing, then this blog of mine is well worth, well worth the time and the openness in which I share some of my journey.

A step in the right direction, to put you on the path he had planned for you all along, be brave, be strong and trust him with all you have.

The other day I was sitting quietly, talking to the lord, then I could hear a faint response.

Yes world, this may seem so foreign to you, but when you know him. You cannot rebuke the knowledge you have experienced.

Its amazing to me, every time, why because how wonderful is it. How precious is he, when you let him in.

Again, I had something happen and all I could do, is sit with him. I have nothing else to give and nothing else to have.

Listening many times as a human worldly brain is hard, hard to fathom what I am on about, not knowing how a book could be real, how a history spoken about could have happened.

But how many go to tarot reading etc and believe that millarky. Trust me, when I was in the world I knew things, I did these and I know its from the enemy. But do not ever discount how he can turn you around, how he can direct your path in the right way.

There is a book that was suggested to me and boy is it an eye opener. Why, we so often whine and whinge about ourselves or others and we get so wound up, we cannot see straight anymore.

But, when you say his words the right way, things are aligned correctly, you can feel it.

As I sit here I am patiently waiting for ancestry to establish the worldly past connections. Why, that voice of my mum stating things, but with my family, you cannot trust documents, you cannot trust stories. You have to dig, dig past all the rubbish to find the truth and to me this is the start. I found once I started I could hear my mum laugh, she knew I never believed a persons word. Because so many times it turned out to be a lie. So, the earth has been broken with the shovel, now I wait…